What Social Media Should I Keep (or Do People Even Blog Anymore?)

Many years ago I read how writers need a social media presence and I jumped in one hundred percent. I joined Facebook, Twitter, Linked In, Google+, Wattpad, probably a ton of others I don't even remember now, set up this blog, set up a website and promptly felt overwhelmed. I wasn't going to give up, though. If social media was what I had to do to be successful, than I was going to do my best!

Fast forward to today, and a lot has changed in my life, and to my perspective on writing. I've learned to view my writing "career" as a journey and while I'm on this journey I better be enjoying myself or I won't keep going. There has to be a balance between ambition and acceptance, or I end up with paralyzing anxiety that prevents me from writing.

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I have been evaluating all of my social media accounts and trying to decide which are worth spending time on and which I should let go of, because I don't have time for writing, cultivating all the social media accounts I've developed in the past and living the rest of my life.

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Part of why I wanted to resurrect this blog site is because I miss the ability to connect with people. Blogging seems to allow the most opportunities to share full thoughts and ideas and have a decent discussion (if others will engage, of course.) Some of the friends I made blogging are the ones who are still talking with me today, and are the biggest support to me as a writer. 

On Twitter I see so many new writers looking for connections, for someone to talk to about their experiences and so excited about their beginning writer's journey. While I'm not some amazingly published writer who meets the standard measures of writing success, I would still like to be able to offer, through this blog, a place for people to find inspiration and motivation along their way.


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Twitter happens to be the social media site I have maintained over the last several years, because it is where I found some real friends whom I am very fond of. We bonded over Shakespeare and I can't imagine not checking in and seeing how everyone is doing. The nature of tweeting is to be short and sweet, and this is a plus. It's a good way to connect with lots of people in a shorter amount of time. Now if only it would stop being so angry over there!

After all the issues we've learned over the past two years regarding Facebook and privacy violations, I don't really spend a lot of time over there. I do maintain my author page, though, and try to post periodically. I view Facebook more as a delivery system than a place to cultivate relationships.

I am planning on closing my Wattpad account. I haven't been successful over there since Finding Meara released and I think the only reason the release went as good as it did was because of the family and friends who gave it the first boost so it was actually visible. I don't have the time now to devote to developing a reader base on Wattpad and write new stuff, too. It's kind of like when your hair gets too long and you need a trim. Wattpad is a place I feel I can trim and not miss anything.


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Please keep in mind, though, that the main point of this post is that I am making my decisions based off what I feel fits my desires and needs best. I'm not pushing myself into a cookie cutter design of social media presence just to make sure my bases are covered. I'm designing my social media presence around how I think I'll get the most enjoyment in the process and offer the most to my potential readers. 

And finally, just because I don't think a site works for me doesn't mean it won't work for you!! That's between you and your own personal journey. I wish you the best of luck with finding what makes the best sense to you and will give you the most satisfaction.

Have a great week!

What does your social media presence look like? Have you been more active in the past, or are you just starting out in the social media maze?

Squirrel!! Post: Can You Be Too Social On Social Media?

Today's post is supposed to be Theme Park, but I'm not feeling very thematic, so I thought I'd post about a writer's frenemy, social media.

As all writers know, we are encouraged to build "author platforms" on as many social media sites as possible. For the introvert and the socially awkward, this can be exceedingly painful.

I've taken the Myers-Briggs Personality test, and at one time had a 50/50 split in introvert and extrovert. As I've grown older, I've slid more to the introvert side, but I still enjoy talking with and meeting new people. It's even better when I meet people who have the same interests I do, and that's the wonderful thing about social media. We are able to connect with people who are like us - for me it's people you might find at a Comic-Con or library event - but we don't have to go anywhere.

Photo courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net

The bad thing is that if you're socially awkward, social media can lead to Social Media Distress (SMD). SMD is the feeling that you're an idiot, have no right to interact with other people on any level, that everyone hates you and you should go eat worms.

I have identified three recurring ways I can be afflicted with Social Media Distress. 

1. Where is everybody?

The feeling you are being social on social media to only yourself. I hate that feeling! Just by joining social media sites you are putting yourself out there to be ignored. Any insecurity you've ever had is magnified the moment you send your tweet or publish your post. It's like being the new kid in school, approaching the popular kids in class, and having them turn away from you.

2. Comment Diarrhea

I'm very talkative. I've had a therapist friend explain that I'm an "external processor" and I think he's right. I have to say "it" to process it and get it out of my head. It's probably why I'm a writer. However, I've had people be unkind about my inability to shut up. I've worked quite hard at learning to read bodily cues so I know when to stop. But, guess what?

You have nothing to help you out on social media. I can't see you! I don't know if your tone of voice is going "For God's sake, why doesn't she quit tweeting me!" I have no idea if I'm coming across as friendly, like some maniacal stalker, or, if I don't tweet back, as some arrogant jerk. Couple that with an Italian Grandmother who drilled it into me that we must be mannerly (How in God's name does one end a twitter conversation without being rude?), and social media conversations can totally set off an anxiety attack.

The sad thing? I love, love, love talking with people on twitter. I've met some really interesting people, but I don't want to freak anyone out by being too friendly. Does anyone know of some kind of cue people give to let you know you don't have to respond?

3. I Really Shouldn't Have Said/Done That

A past employer said I'm guileless. Many people who know me agree, and while that's a lovely trait to have, it also means that I don't have a good filter for what should remain unsaid. Add in being an external processor, and I have trouble, with a capital T.

I know enough to not talk about the hot button topics. It's more a matter of personal transparency and self-expression. Like, I express myself poorly, and make a fool of myself doing it. The moment after I push the publish button, I usually have a flood of thoughts like: "What did I just do?" "How stupid did I just sound?" "Is anyone ever going to be able to take me seriously again?"

For me, Social Media Distress occurs because I feel misunderstood. I'm really not a maniacal stalker, idiot, or arrogant jerk. Thankfully I am not important enough for people to really get uptight, but one misstep on social media for famous people and they can really be in trouble, which I don't think is very fair.

It's taken some time to figure out how I want to use social media to augment my personal and professional life. I've focused on a few sites for different purposes, instead of trying out every site for every purpose. I've tried to relax my personal and professional expectations for social media interactions. I'm learning how to enjoy social media, instead of letting it stress me out. And, amazingly, it's working.

Do you ever get Social Media Distress?

Do you have any tricks that helped you get over it?