Wow - it's been a month since I posted anything. I knew it had been awhile, but a full month? My excuse is lagging determination and vacillating commitment to blogging, and writing in general, for that matter. "People" always say you have to want to be a writer because you "have" to write. Here is my confession - I don't have the absolute need to write. I like to write. I miss writing when I don't do it. It feels wonderful to be creative and make stories up and have the people who read them enjoy them. It feels absolutely fabulous that I finally found a publisher who thinks one of my stories should be shared with more people than just my family and closest friends.
But, there is a cost involved for anything we do. The time I spend writing takes me away from my family - even if I am writing in the living room with them just ten feet away. I don't have any other hobbies now - no scrapbooking, no sewing, no cross-stitching. I feel guilty often for the attention I give the characters of a story, when my sweet little boys play next to me.
I'm telling you all of this because over the last month it has been a daily fight in my head. Is it worth it? These are the things I talk over with my lovely, supportive husband. And it was during one of these talks when the truth came out. I want to be a writer. Not because I have to, not because I'm driven to, but because I want to. By understanding that about myself, I can then try to be, not only a successful writer, but a woman of value. I will weigh the costs, and adjust my writing, so that I am the best mother and wife and daughter I can be. But I will write - and hopefully, I will be successful!
But, there is a cost involved for anything we do. The time I spend writing takes me away from my family - even if I am writing in the living room with them just ten feet away. I don't have any other hobbies now - no scrapbooking, no sewing, no cross-stitching. I feel guilty often for the attention I give the characters of a story, when my sweet little boys play next to me.
I'm telling you all of this because over the last month it has been a daily fight in my head. Is it worth it? These are the things I talk over with my lovely, supportive husband. And it was during one of these talks when the truth came out. I want to be a writer. Not because I have to, not because I'm driven to, but because I want to. By understanding that about myself, I can then try to be, not only a successful writer, but a woman of value. I will weigh the costs, and adjust my writing, so that I am the best mother and wife and daughter I can be. But I will write - and hopefully, I will be successful!
Hey Lara. You just posted on my Blog so I thought I'd return the favour. I'm at the start of my blogging journey so I have come to the start of yours. How is that struggle going. Being a dad of two little ones I totally get the guilt feeling almost every time I think about writing instead of spending time with them or doing something for them. In the back of my mind I keep telling myself that one day it will be time well sacrificed. But you know what some days I'm just not sure. I tend to go and jump on the trampoline with them when that happens. Anyway thanks for the comment. My Twitter is denofalltrades as is the facebook account so take your pick if you want to keep half an ear to what I'm chatting about and if not then good luck with your writing and other stuff.
ReplyDeleteWell, I hope you're going to come back and read this ! Maybe I'll just comment (DM) you on Twitter. I definitely appreciate the time you took to stop by and find my beginning! I do think that it's hard to balance writing and family, and every other thing that goes on in a day. However, I truly believe that you SHOULD go out on that trampoline! They are children for only a short time, and they need you (just like mine need me!) Writing does have to come before some things, but when it comes down to it, our relationships are what makes life worth living, and for me (and it sounds like for you) that's the important thing! Writing will take care of itself. In fact, I think this weeks Tuesday post is going to be something about that! I will definitely be following what you have to say - both on Twitter and through blogger!
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